One dream we’ve always had was to buy four places around the world.
Could you imagine? (It’s like Max’s dream of having six kids. Not entirely impossible, but not entirely realistic, either. And, no, we don’t think we’re having any more kids).
Anyway, one in Europe, one in Asia, one in North America, one in South America…
We never really dreamed about owning a home in the United States, though. Maybe occasionally we pictured some suburban life in New Jersey with a backyard and space for the kids. (As people who used to hate the suburbs, we kind of get it now.) When Hana lost her home as a child, she’s always wavered between wanting that permanence and not being interested in it all, and what actually makes a home a “home”. Max, on the other hand, his mom still lives in the same house he grew up in.
Of course, we’re not here nor there anymore (no pun intended). Yet, we still imagined little bases around the world.
And nowadays, with all the videos about “cheap homes” in Italy or Japan, it almost feels possible, if you’re willing to pour in the time, money, paperwork, and emotional energy. (Maybe when our kids are older?)
The truth is, a few years ago, we actually moved back to the U.S. with the goal of buying a multi-family property.
The plan was: live in one unit when we visited, rent the other, and use it as a financial base for our life abroad.
A place to come back to.
A place that was ours (even if other people lived in it).
But then the pandemic happened, prices skyrocketed, and suddenly it stopped making sense for us financially to keep pursuing that goal. Honestly, looking back now, it was probably for the best considering everything we later went through in Portugal, as one hiccup in the property and we wouldn’t have been able to pay for it.
Still, owning property has been a goal we’ve had for years. (Hana even wrote this for Apartment Therapy back when we were living in Mexico. Didn’t come true, but still).
At first, it was about having a project. A base. Something permanent. A plan B. An investment for the future.
And, admittedly, not having to deal with shady landlords anymore if we did decide to live there.
(We could genuinely write a book about this. We’re currently dealing with another aggressive property manager who seems angry that we informed him about structural issues in the apartment.)
But now, with kids, our minds have kind of been changing again. Or rather, we’ve been more focused on it.
Because even though one of the reasons we chose this lifestyle was freedom — the ability to move when we want to move — lately we’ve started craving something that feels a little more rooted. Not necessarily permanent, but…practical?
A home that’s actually ours.
A place where we can leave our stuff. Their stuff.
A place our kids could come back to in 20 years and say: “Yeah, I grew up there.”
Or maybe a place we still own by then and rent out or share when we’re not in it.
A place where we can finally store some of our books, buy that cool tea kettle we’ve always wanted, hang up the pictures for good (we still do all these things, but to an extent).
If you’ve ever read Deborah Levy’s Real Estate, there are some real gems that spoke to me (ironically, I read the book in a bookstore in Barcelona, where we were traveling with Mika):
It seemed that acquiring a house was not the same thing as acquiring a home. And connected to home was a question I swatted away every time it landed too near me. Who else was living with me in the grand old house with the pomegranate tree? Was I alone with the melancholy fountain for company? No. There was definitely someone else there with me, perhaps even cooling their feet in that fountain. Who was this person? A phantom.”
Or…
“I was also searching for a house in which I could live and work and make a world at my own pace, but even in my imagination this home was blurred, undefined, not real, or not realistic, or lacked realism.”
We still think renting makes the most sense on paper. As slow travelers, it really is the only option. It’s why we’ve almost always chosen furnished apartments, too, or only purchase second-hand furniture. What’s the point of investing heavily into a place when you don’t even know how long you’ll stay?
But one of the reasons we live this lifestyle is because we want the freedom to choose when we leave a place.
And renting is supposed to theoretically give you that freedom too.
Except sometimes, it doesn’t.
Sometimes it feels incredibly unstable.
Sometimes the one place that’s supposed to be your sanctuary abroad suddenly feels completely out of your control. And when life abroad already requires so much emotional flexibility, that instability starts to wear on you.
So lately we’ve started asking ourselves:
What would it actually look like to buy somewhere?
Maybe Colombia.
Maybe Ecuador.
Maybe even the U.S.
(As many of you know, we seriously considered Portugal at one point too.)
Unfortunately, financing abroad can be complicated enough in your home country, let alone somewhere else.
And even if we solved that part…where would we buy?
If we bought in Colombia, we’d have a real base here. But we’d also probably be buying for the life we live right now.
And what about 15 years from now?
We think about living somewhere quieter, maybe closer to nature, but Bogotá traffic makes that difficult if the kids attend certain schools.
We’ve also talked a lot about Ecuador. Max could possibly qualify for financing there because he’s a citizen, although it would still be complicated. We’ve looked near Quito because if we ever did live there full-time, we’d still want access to the city, schools, and infrastructure. We’d also always have a reason to go back.
At the same time, if we suddenly had a million dollars tomorrow, we’d probably buy some tiny slightly-janky apartment in New York City. (We actually almost did when we lived in Jersey City. We were ready to sign, and someone who owned an apartment in the same building called us and warned us to stay away as the HOA was in a deficit and there was a legal battle going on. It was this one. We also LOVED this one in Newark.)
Not just because our families are there.
But because it’s New York.
The dream base. (And, the dream airport hub).
We’ve also talked about upstate New York and even Baltimore — places that still feel somewhat connected while remaining (slightly) more affordable.
But then we ask ourselves another question:
If we bought somewhere, would we actually return enough for it to matter?
Or are we still trying to solve a feeling more than a housing problem?
This is still all a daydream right now.
(Maybe because we suddenly both have full-time remote jobs and our brains immediately went: “Should we buy property somewhere??”)
How do you even choose a “base” when you don’t know where your life is going to be in the next five years?
Do you get a two-bedroom? A three-bedroom? What neighborhood?
When options are limited due to financing, what’s the “good enough” option…the evergreen one?
Anyway, for now, maybe we’ll just settle for buying a car.
It’d be ours, we can leave stuff in it, and we can still “go” whenever we want! (Within reason…driving around Colombia isn’t quite the same as driving around Portugal).
Share with us:
Do you own property back in your home country or abroad? If so, what did that process look like, and what is it like now? Do you plan to ever live there?
If you don’t yet, do you want to?
Have kids changed how you think about “home”, even as a family that lives abroad or travels?
Share your story with us at [email protected]
Check these out:
We read a lot, so we thought maybe we’d put some recommendations. A lot came to mind while writing this piece today:
Also, if you loved Under the Tuscan Sun and Eat, Pray, Love, La Dolce Villa on Netflix was cute.
There are also tons of YouTube channels or stories on these topics and maybe some of you have, so please feel free to share!